Unsurprisingly, Momma Montag went all bats in the belfry as her half-baked douchebag of a daughter knocked on their house door and looked just exactly like how much of an empty can of of a person she is before but with a completely brand new packaging. When she asked her mom if she looked good and her mom just gave her a sigh, she went all wack.
"God created me. And God created Dr. Frank Ryan. Maybe God gave me extra because He knew what I would be doing with the career and blessing me with such a great doctor."
"I actually feel very plastic."
"If Cleopatra were alive now, I'm sure she'd also have triple D's."
"Before I wouldn't smile on red carpet because I had Jay Leno chin and when I smile they get elongated."