Stripped from my INNOCENCE

And on this night I felt like I have been raped. Like I have been devirginized. Deflowered. Demoralized. Like I have been harshly decorticated from my unaffected charm. Would you believe me? Do I sound convincing?


This is exactly how I look like when people rape me. Like I try to warp my face in a very grotesque fashion. More like my own way version of a defense mechanism.






Although I do not, in any way (as I am very much convinced) appear horribly disheveled from the looks of these shots, deep inside and deep down there wreaked some tragic havoc as I lunged in that, ughck, drink. When again was the last time I took a sip from a stirring shot glass?


Last Monday? UGHk. Memories I would NOT like to remember. Thanksbutnothankssothankyouverymuch.

So anyway, on this night we all had fun. I somehow, partly, inexplicably enjoyed the alcohol since it's been months already (err, weeks cuz I cheated) since I have been steady on working out with my soberness. In essence I felt like I broke my promise but, gaaah, what the hell! It's not like I crawled at a snail's pace because I got drunk.

THE Lovebirds were also there! Paris & MileyApril! Felt like they formed in synergy to make me feel that I AM FRICKIN SINGLE DEMMET!!!



On my next post. Will still have to finish a case study. Wish me luck!

Sober Saturday Part II

It's been almost four months since the last time I passed out - like completely sucked up by alcohol. Blame that cold bubbly drink.

Fast forward present time and my subdued clear-headedness from alcohol is still as prevalent as ever. It feels so liberating to be able to constrain myself from temptation, as well as sticking up myself to the kind of change I swore of in front of the mirror. Well at least the most that I have gone so far was a sip out of a cup of gin. LOL.

So last Saturday, I took pictures instead of shots.


And I felt the moment. The moment when fresh Davao air crawled up my leg up to my UPPER-EST thigh. Haha. Imagine the comfort that women get from those PEKPEK shorts that I happen to have worn last weekend. LOLness.


Earlier that day was a bonding moment between Ada & I. So fun to have finally caught up with each other after sooo long! Food mixed with laughter is just the best! Best way to encourage you to chew your food well. Haha.

Too bad we weren't able to take good quality pictures from our date but thanks to a handy phone camera I was able to post pictures of us in my Twitter. I really, really, really had fun with her!!! I'll promise to post pictures from our next date when it happens! :)







It has been totally a crazy night for me and the rest of us! Krizia and Kat (not in pictures) have finally been in the same rooftop with an approximately 2-meter radius away from each other but keeping in mind how they have been on quite a rough patch for some time, it almost felt like a MIRACLE to even hear Katrina talking to her! Amazeballs!

Drunk F/Phase

For the past months of this year and the entire year last year, majority of what I could efficiently remember during time spans between 7pm to around midnight were awfully blur. And in some serious cases I could not even remember anything. As in zilch. Nada. None.

Obviously, this has rooted out when I found close affection with the likes of tequila, rhum, vodka and premium strength that I finally succumbed to what they call, well, in layman's term, party everyday - the wackiest and the craziest phase of my life where I met the guts and learned how to stomach frog legs, ask a takatak boy to buy me an entire country to help me build a nation, and command a friend to suck blood from my bleeding finger (to which she gladly said yes). And trust me, those weren't even my worst case scenario.

There might be countless of times when I act like one miserably hopeless nut perhaps because I don't like what I'm wearing, is being asked to go home early, or have missed out on my favorite prime time tv show, but other than that I could not anymore place myself anywhere between miserable and permanently depressed. I love the feeling of being uncontrollably free - set aside all worries and tension and just drink the night away. I am not miserable. Drinking over misery is pathetic and immature, but when your problems are so major that you just have to gulp it all down your liver, you only do that at HOME and not on public areas, bars, and definitely not on school just like I did, hence you are getting yourself into serious trouble.

However, since I technically do not have an iron liver, I have resorted to putting myself into probation. Up to this day, I remain sturdy with my oath that I will not drink any alcoholic drink of any sort for a good one month. Serves enough reason why I have been distancing away from my friends for the prior weeks. I just want to feel clean, let all toxins, free radicals, and booze get flushed away in my system until I, again, feel sacred enough to start on yet another life phase. I'm not really saying goodbye to drinking but I'll have it in moderation this time. God knows how much I DO NOT want another February 2010 episode in my life where I spoke a valley-girl accent and nearly had 20 trips to the bathroom in one night. Luckily, I have already gone over that page.

For three weeks in a row, I was all water, iced tea, and orange juice and I know I am worthy of all applause and noisy hear-hear's from everyone who witnessed my flipped out drinking tactics. Besides I got so tired of getting drunk and feeling wasted; finally I have found another pseudo sister in the form of rice toppings and sweet treats. Guess this will be another phase in excess. Wish me luck!